It Does Matter Who You Know!

Frustrated and unsuccessful salespeople can often be heard saying that, It is not fair…what you know doesn’t matter…it’s who you know that does.

What’s so unfair about that? Now, I believe there is a need for knowing and being professional and competent. But what is so wrong with knowing the right people, so to speak, and capitalizing on that relationship to accomplish your means?

It sounds more like resentment to me then an issue of fairness when I hear the complaints of those who criticize the reality that business is about relationships; and so, life is about relationships as well.

Putting aside all arguments, let’s just say that I am as equally repulsed as other people by the statement, What you know doesn’t matter as much as who you know that matters, especially when it comes to job opportunities, career advancement and success personally and professionally. But then, what good would it do if I refused to accept the fact of relationships and the power they have in influencing people and achieving success in life over knowledge, subject matter expertise or experience?

Why not use your network of relationships to gain access to people in order to sell the greatest product to have ever been conceived by the mind of man? Frankly, that's a lot of how business and commerce works...by way of relationships!

If You Want to be Successful in Life, You Must Understand How Life Works

In order to be successful in life, you must learn how life works, and find ways to work with, or around life; its challenges, opportunities and set backs. So again, let’s set aside the issue of people who leverage the relationships they have to get what they want is fair or not fair and acknowledge the fact that, yes, it does matter who you know.

Networking, no matter how unpalatable it may be to the high minded, is a fact of life and a legitimate means of gaining access to people who need your expertise. Do you hear me? People need you and what you have to offer. What better justification is there for leveraging relationships to your advantage?

How unfair or distasteful can it be for you, then, to network among your acquaintances to gain access to them, set appointments under favorable conditions, and avoid the normal resistance encountered with truly cold contacts?

Consider the Following:

1. Have a game plan; an opening statement you are comfortable with in meeting new people. In some instances, being prepared to share who you are and what you do for people is an excellent pattern to follow when making introductions with new acquaintances. Some call it an elevator speech or 30 second commercial.

The following are some possible ways to introduce yourself to individuals and to begin building your network of influence and friends:

Hi, I'm Tom Smith. This is my first meeting. Are you a member?
(Get people talking about themselves and what they like. Be interested in people. Find out what they do for an occupation, where they were born and what hobbies they may have. Also, ask about family, kids, names; these are all things that help the agent and customer connect as quickly as possible with you.)

Hi, I'm Tom Smith. I'm new to this group. How about you? Are you a member?

Hi, I'm Tom Smith. I was wondering if you could help me with something. This is my first meeting and I really don't know anyone. Would it be possible for you to introduce me to some of your members?
Possibly said to a host/hostess of a meeting or a center of influence in a gathering.)

Hi, I'm Tom Smith- an insurance agent with XYZ company here in the Columbus area. I work with business owners just like you in helping them use their insurance dollars as best as they can while helping to improve bottom line results. Oftentimes, I'm able to help reduce a business owners expenses while at the same time ensuring they are completely protected...and that's important in our "sue happy" society.

*Whatever the approach...make sure it is one that you are comfortable with delivering and owning. Think about using the phraseology, Could you help me?

One of the greatest of human desires is the desire to be wanted and to be a help to people. Strangers naturally respond positively to such requests for help. e.g. I wonder if you could help me, I've been wanting to meet Frank Stone now for weeks and haven't had the opportunity or occasion to talk to him. I understand that you two know each other and I was wondering if you could help me by introducing me to him.

Try it out. It works.

Copyright © 2009 - Tony Cefalu